At 54 years old, Daniel Baerg is finding his footing — and his purpose — in recovery. His journey has not been linear. It has been marked by deep personal loss, multiple relapses, and, ultimately, a profound surrender to the reality of his addiction. Today, he’s not only staying sober — he’s helping others do the same.

“I started my recovery process when I was in my late 30s,” Daniel begins. “It was one of my first treatment centers. And then after I left that treatment center, I probably was sober about 30 days before I relapsed.”

His second attempt came in his early-to-mid 40s, and it didn’t last either. “I think I probably made it almost two months, but not quite. And then I relapsed. And then I just basically didn’t worry about it. I just kept drinking.”

He then married a woman who was also an alcoholic. “We were married for six years. And the last year we were married, she got cirrhosis of the liver. And I took care of her while she was dying.” Daniel had promised to be there with her, at Sacred Heart in Spokane, when she passed, holding her hand — but when the moment came, he wasn’t.

“I was here in Colville on a bender, and I was drunk. And the guilt and shame from that is something that I’ve really had to recover for a long period of time,” he said.

That was only four and a half months ago. The grief led Daniel to treatment again — this time, at Pioneer Center East, an addiction treatment center in Spokane. “When [my wife] died and I was home drunk, I came to the realization that if I didn’t stop drinking, I was going to die too… And at the time, I really felt like it. That’s why I pulled myself out of my bender and I asked for help. And that’s when I learned what complete surrender felt like. And so that was my very first surrender, I think, to the fact that I really was a hopeless alcoholic.”

Daniel reflected on what made this attempt different from the others. “The first two times I realized that one of my character defaults was overthinking. And so I could always, always figure out what I got out of recovery the first two times. ‘I got this. I got it. I finally got it figured out.’ Well, unfortunately, this disease is not something that you can figure out.”

The importance of community in recovery

This time, Daniel knew he needed more than just treatment — he needed structure and community. “You need to be in a recovery group. And the statistics say that people who do not join a recovery group when they come out of treatment, more than likely will relapse within the first 60 days. So being a part of a recovery group, coming right out, whether that be a 12-step program or in a sober living house, it’s really, really critical for continued recovery.”

Daniel found that support at the Bridges of Hope recovery house in Colville, run by Hope Street Project and the recovery house in Stevens County. “I’ve been there for going on 3 1/2 months when I got out of recovery. And Rural Resources was really important in helping me find a grant for the first three months. That was really nice.”

His recovery has been comprehensive: three days a week in intensive outpatient treatment, weekly addiction counseling, and almost-daily AA meetings. That’s how he first found the Connections Recovery Café.

“Colville doesn’t have an AA meeting on Thursdays,” Daniel explains. “I heard [about the Café] from a friend at my recovery house. And I went a couple times and then the third time I was like, yeah, I can do this. And so I filled out the application and became a part of the Thursday group at 2 o’clock.”

Now, Daniel leads that group. “Of course, there has to be a representative from Recovery Café in there, but I lead that group, and it’s been a really cool one. And I like it because it’s a different approach than the 12-step programs. We have a check-in sheet. And so it gives it more of a different thought process when people check in. They’re like, how was your day? What are you going through?”

He’s added a goal-setting element too. “At the end of last Thursday, I said, let’s all set a goal that we want to have accomplished by next week. And so we each gave a goal. And then so that way, when we check in this Thursday, it’ll be about if you accomplished your goal.”

Daniel also re-enrolled in school — sober this time. “I was pretty good at school. I have a 3.7 GPA. And so this fall quarter, I’m going to be in my next year of [Spokane Falls Community College’s] addiction counseling program. So I have three classes that I’ve enrolled in. And so I’m excited about that. School starts today.”

Moriah Rancourt, the Recovery Café manager, has been instrumental in helping him navigate everything. “She’s been really helpful personally in helping me with my application for school, the financial aspect of it, showing me how to fill out grants for grants and for FAFSA, et cetera. And today she’s helping us look for books that are the least expensive for our classes.”

He’s also working with her to find employment. “She also has helped me look for work, and she’s helped me create a cover letter and a one-page resumé to turn into different places to get work in the area.”

His long-term goal is clear: “To stay sober, to stay in recovery and to maintain a community of people around me in recovery. That is a main everyday goal. And having my daily recovery program, like my higher power time, my meditation time with God, et cetera. All these are very critical for me to maintain.”

Giving back to help other through recovery

Professionally, he wants to stay rooted in his rural community. “I want to become an addiction counselor because I want to relate to my community.” Daniel has worked as a truck driver, hauled chips and logs, and lost jobs because of his drinking. “So in that aspect, if we do have a guy who comes in who’s from the mills or what have you, I recognize what that work is all about. But I also have been thrown in the Stevens County Jail, so I’m going to be able to help out that guy too.”

He knows the resources in rural areas are limited. “I don’t want to go to Spokane County. I don’t want to go to another part of the state or somewhere else. I want to stay here in Stevens County in Colville and give back to my community. That’s my long-term professional goal. And I’ll probably do that for the rest of my life.”

Daniel is also planning his next move toward stable housing. “Recovery house living is not a full-time place to live. It’s a place where you can get back on your feet… So there are programs that will enable me to get a place to live outside of this, where I can sustain my needs and meet my needs.”

He recognizes the stigma that surrounds addiction. “Alcoholics and addicts don’t want to be stigmatized and labeled. We’re human beings just like everybody else. We just happen to have this particular disease. But we still like to be treated with dignity and respect. And we like to live that way as well.”

Daniel’s view of recovery has matured with experience. “People think recovery is black and white. You can flip the switch. Or if you’re drinking wine, you just stop. But recovery is a gray area. And that’s where the person in recovery is.”

Ultimately, he knows the work starts within. “You have to build your own recovery program internally. Because externally you can have meetings and programs and groups and all this stuff, but if one of those falls apart and you’re depending on that group or that meeting, that can cause a relapse. So I have to build an internal recovery program and not depend on external.”

That internal strength is what guides him now. “I want to help the next Daniel. Or the next Laura, my wife. I want to be a part of the solution.”